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Bless The Broken Road - Rascal Flatts
janellyluvsu
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Name: Janelle
Birthday: 11/25/1990
Gender: Female


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I ♥ GOD
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I ♥ YOU =]


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AIM: wo0o itz janelle


Member Since: 9/26/2005

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Thursday, May 07, 2009

God bless the broken road

its been a while.. so ill jus let out how im feeling..

Life brings us trials and challenges that can be so hard to understand... but in order to live a happy life.. you need to live your life with God and for God.. and thats something i truely strive for.. to have a strong relationship with God and trust him with everything that i do.. at this time.. it may be one of the hardest times for my life.. but i know if i put trust in God that ill make it... It sucks how we doubt God sometimes and turn away from him.. its terrible how we let the devil turn us away from God even when we dont realize it.. with this situation right now.. i know i was caught off guard.. i wasn't completely living my life with God.. and i turned my back on him so slightly that it led to this... it led to turning my life completely around.. it scares me so much because i dont ever want the devil to get to me and do something so terrible.. something so unlikely of me that i question who i truely am by doing such a horrible thing... but i know that God will help me through this i know that God has given us these trials and challenges in order to better ourselves.. I've grown up so much to realize that everything i went through in the past was all so worth it.. because i know that if i had never went through all of it.. i wouldn't be able to handle wutever comes at me.. like right now.. i truely am confused but i'm so much stronger than i probably ever wouldve been without the trials that came along with it.. I've gotten to this point right now that as much as i regret.. as much as i wish i could take back the mistakes i just made.. i know to just trust that God brought me here and will help me get through it.. i truely believe that somehow maybe WE did need this.. even tho nothing was ever intentional... i never wanted to hurt you.. but i guess like you said.. WE BOTH made mistakes.. and we need mistakes in relationships to become stronger.. we need all the hardships and trials.. because God throws all of them at us so we can see passed it.. so we can work together to better ourselves.. and not just our relationship... but OURSELVES.. we become so blinded by the imperfections in life that we have to realize God truely does work in such mysterious ways.. in order to see the true beauty in life, you must first be faced with all the ugliness in the world.. hurt, pain, trials.. all the things that makes life seem so not worth it.. all the things that the devil wants us to see.. and want us to believe.. so that we give up.. so that we look down on ourselves and the people around us.. when REALLY, God wants us to see passed it and truely picture the beauty that comes along with it... without all the ugliness in the world we wouldn't be able to see all the beautiful things, because we just wouldn't know what they are.. just like in relationships.. with love.. you have to hurt.. you have to experience receiving and giving pain in order to fully understand situations.. and we just have to accept it and move forward.. we strive to better ourselves and our relationship.. we see the ugliness then truely appreciate the BEAUTY.. so thats wut im going to do.. as hard as it is to be strong.. i'm gonna do it not just for myself or for the people around me but for God.. because it truely does make my life seem so worth when i think about living it with God.. when i know i can put all my trust in him that he will guide me in the right direction.. and with the situation that it is right now.. in my heart and in my mind all i can think about is just to fight.. to hold on.. but not too tight.. to give you your space but pray that somehow we will get through this.. because we've gotten through so much already.. through these past years.. nothing could ever compare.. so lets keep making it all worth it... cuz just seeing that you've grown so much closer to God and have truely accepted him in your life.. just makes me feel so incredibly happy.. because i feel that God truely worked through me to help you.. and with that.. i feel accomplished.. i feel that no matter wut happens between us right now.. i think that God is trying to tell me that all the faith and hope i've given you will truely help you with this situation right now.. and thats wut we need and thats wut u'll need to get ready for the rest of your life.. he's opened your eyes to all his blessings..to truely see life differently and understand the beauty AND the ugliness that comes along with it.. to strive to walk along that path with him your whole life.. so that in the end...you'll that there is no end.. you live eternally with God.. and thats all anyone should really pray for .. to know that no matter where u go.. or how u end up... u end up truely happy with God..

okay i need to go to class now.. but i think i'm gonna come back to this xanga =) i've realized i was living so happy and now that something hit me so hard... it does make me see so much more..

to: you know who you are,

i love you.. and i pray that God helps us through this and gives us the strength to get passed everything to really see his beautiful work.. and just trust that he'll make everything okay.. :]

 

janelle


Tuesday, August 28, 2007

skool started

ill blog bout that later.. but ima jus post a whole bunch of quotes...


i promise that if you give it your best shot, i'll give it mine & we'll impress the whole world and make them think twice about us <3


she doesn't care if you call her and wake her up in the middle of the night. she hates arguing, but you know she's good at it. she's terrified of the dark, but when she thinks of you, she smiles. she laughs at your jokes even if they're dumb. she loves the way you look at her, and she wouldn't change that for the world.


i was afraid of getting my heart broken again, like before. because you hurt me so bad, and i was afraid to be vulnerable. and i was afraid of you and the way that you make me feel. and i know that doesn't matter now after what i did, but i just thought that you should know. this was how i spent my summer, wanting you. i'm just too scared to admit it.


why is it that after you get hurt once after you pick yourself back up and get back into the race you spend so much time worrying about not falling again that you miss out on so many things.



and sometimes, despite all your best choices and all your good intentions, fate wins anyway.


don't let a guy build you up with his words because the higher you are, the harder you fall and trust me you always fall.


everything happens for a reason. even if it means not getting what you want. because in the end you realize it's exactly what you needed.



sometimes i wish i hadn't been in such a hurry to move forward. there comes a point when it becomes impossible to go back.


a lifetime of love in a hug or a smile, a reason to visit and stay for awhile, the strength of a bond that is destined to last, the joys for the present, the warmth of the past. these are the treasures a fortunate few are lucky to cherish all their lives. through these are the blessings on which we depend, for these are the gifts of a very best friend.



the best and most beautiful things in this world cannot be seen or even heard, but must be felt with the heart.


we talk like we know what's going on, but we don't. we don't know anything. we're young, and we're going to screw up a lot. we're going to keep changing our minds, and sometimes our hearts. and through all that, the only real thing we can offer each other is forgiveness.


don't come running back to me when you get treated the exact same way you treated me.



lucas: i never meant to hurt you.
brooke: that doesn't really matter, because in the end it all hurts just the same.
- one tree hill.


relax work is for people with jobs. you'll never remember class time, but you'll remember the times you were out with your friends. so stay out late, go out on a tuesday night when you have a paper due wednesday. spend money you don't have and drink until sunrise. the work never ends, but high school does.
- tom petty.


once you get something you want, that's when you have something to lose.
- the o.c



you know how there's like, that one person you always go back to. you date other people but you kinda wanna run into them when you're out.
-the hills.


i wanna hold hands, and waste friday nights with you.
- a&f.



if you search your heart and listen to its instructions, you'll end up where you belong.
- Boy Meets World.


men were born to lie, and women were born to believe them.
- sex and the city.




love doesn't walk away, people do.




Monday, August 27, 2007

end of the road

i give up.. im a complete idiot >_< n im making a fool out of myself.. how sad... iuno wtf im doing. but it hurts so bad... n i wish this culd be so much easier =/ well im jus gonna say IM DONE. n iuno wut'll happen but hopefully i can actually say that n mean it..


Saturday, August 25, 2007

nothing ever changes... =/

wut did i do to deserve that?!

wut did i do to be ignored n treated like that!?


i really thot i was starting to get back on track with everything.. n i was starting to be good...but its always to good to be true n it always goes downhill from there.. but im great wen im around certain people.. like yfc.. they bring out the best in me =) but when i come back home... n realize how much a big part of me is still missing..crying myself to sleep..  like wtf. how can u go from a perfect night at the park..running around.. star gazing.. seeing 2 shooting stars.. n the next few days be treated as if you're nothing. i really just dont understand people. n i'm tired of crying. im tired of hurting. i know i put myself in this situation.. n ill get out of it eventually, its jus so hard. as much advice that i get.. or the help.. im sucha stubborn person with horrible self control >_< i feel like a toy that gets thrown aside when not wanted.. but played with when wanted =/..  my heart can't take the games any longer. its gonna get to the point where ima want to give up eh w/e.. i hate feeling sorry for myself by writing these damn blogs. bbye


<3 janelle


Friday, August 10, 2007

like a big slap in the face everytime =/

no matter how hard i try or fight

no matter how patient i can be

no matter how much i do.



u still give me nothing in return but confusion n frustration. u still hurt me. u still mislead me. u still make me feel so used. WTF am i waiting for?! am i even waiting for anything? am i doing all of this to find out that in the end im jus gonna get screwed again n get hurt with nothing? i shuldnt even be still waiting after all the pain u've already caused me. but i do. becus of that lil feelin called "love" ugh wtf. i wish i culd say that i dont deserve this but obviously i do since its all happening. i've taken it in for too long already. i've waited for too long already. i've made sacrifices i wish i didnt have to make. i've risked so much for you. i've helped in everyway possible n taken care of u to the best of my ability. so why is it that your still not satisfied? why is that your able to live your everyday life knowing everythings jus great. not knowing that theres still that one girl waiting for you opening her heart out to love you while u still continue to look at the others. i've fought too long n hard to give up already n end up with nothing. i dont wana have to end up thinking that i've done all of this for nothing. i dont even really understand anymore. i jus live with it. so i guess i jus gotta keep doin that.


janelle



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